So this word has taken on a whole new meaning for me as more and more knowledge has been unveiled to me… by me?
Yes, from myself but also by the universe and it’s consciousness. Let me attempt a very, VERY weak explanation of some of the things I’ve learned over the course of the past few weeks.
For starters, all I know for sure, is that good wins. Whatever that means, and however much weight that holds, every time I have an experience, I come out of it with the thought firmly rooted in my head that good wins, and I’ll tell you why there was initial struggle.
I’m sure you have all seen the infinity symbol before, a continuous loop, with one intersecting part?
Well this symbol has been designed so perfectly for so many reasons.
I’m not sure yet if each side represents good vs. evil, or if it’s start to finish, or just that it goes back and forth, because that’s the thing about infinity, there no end or beginning. There’s no describing it. It just is. Everything just is. It starts out from where ever and continually loops onto itself… Like our lives themselves.
I remember when this journey first started I originally likened my experience to everything in my life coming together into a funnel, and then starting fresh out the other side. Empty, bare and silent (which is when the birth of love was first revealed to me: We Were Born To Be Princes Of The Universe No Man Could Understand My Power Is In My Own Hand). Now I’ve learned that yes, all my past experiences had culminated to that point, and for that reason, for me to discover that I had come to that intersecting point of infinity if you will. And all my deja vue’s that I felt had become stronger and stronger, was because I was travelling closer to the middle of the intersection, to a place I had not physically been before but in a way had memories of.
Because all those deja vue’s were moments that I had not necessarily experienced before in this life, but I had helped create them, which is why they seemed so familiar.
Which leads me to the next PHENOMENAL fact.
We are all creators of this world. We all are in control of our own destiny’s. (Duh, you’re thinking, we all make our own choices in life everyday… no, I’m talking on a much grander scale) Not just this human lifetime, but to infinity. Because we will just continue to live, over and over and over.
And I have realized this over and over almost every night since my first revelation almost two months ago.
When paranoia and pure joy were struggling to compete, it’s almost like I’ve been at war in the crossroads for a while. But after realizing the connection I have to the world/universe and the energy within me (and potentially within us all), I have discovered that there were two paths, something I could no longer deny.
One of definite pure evil, bringing the greatest fear and even sometimes physical pain to my body, and one of everything good and joyful and pure ecstasy. This is not as simple as it seems. Because when it comes, it feels as though you are dying every death imaginable, and then you life starts out slowly again, in the same place, and you re-live EVERY memory you’ve ever had, and it speeds up the present moment, and then, that moment becomes larger and more fantastic than you could have ever imagined, and you realize you have gained all the wisdom you have ever had, plus more, and you understand that this will just continue to happen. Forever. But then you realize, you’ve been here before. And the back and forth struggle starts within the mind. Even laying in my bed last night, while I check the date/time on my phone, I KNOW that I’ve been here before, even though I could see that ‘time’ had in fact passed and I knew things had happened that day that were new and fresh.
And I know that this will continue. Forever. And it goes back and forth between the highest joy, knowing I can live forever (if I choose, although not in this life, but in my soul) and this highest fear and agony, knowing this will continue forever. FOREVER! Could I handle this struggle between my greatest fear/greatest joy forever?
Two paths, but only one choice. So this weekend when I chose to stop fighting it, and made the decision to embrace it, as long as it was good, so much joy and peace has come.
I no longer have even the slightest paranoia after my experiences because I know, I KNOW that good wins. I also know that life will continue on as normal, because that is how our consciousness have designed it to. I know that every individual will make their own choices, as I have made mine. I know that I have a soul mate and even if I don’t end up with them now, I will. Because we have all of infinity.
I know that good wins.
And that’s good for me.